Ikea…Oh how you have failed me.

We all know the drill. You plan to make an outing to Ikea. You need a new Lack table for your living room. Or maybe a denim covered Poang Chair to finish off the neo-retro look to your lounge. But first you know you need to eat. You need Swedish Meatballs! After all, you will be walking around that place for like 18hrs. right? Maybe it’s just me…I dunno. But that is always my plan.  In the past it has always worked well.  But this time…not so much. 

It was just a light snack to get me through the maze of housewares and furnishings.

Hula’s Modern Tiki Brings the Funk!

If you live in Phoenix you have probably passed Hula’s Modern Tiki a 100 times as you drive down Central Ave. If you were smart, you’ve stopped in for Brunch or an after work cocktail during Happy Hour. If not, here’s the chance to see what you are missing.  This is a two-fold review.  AM/PM. Brunch and Happy Hour. First up is brunch! The greatest meal time in the world! Hula’s does brunch each Saturday and Sunday with your typical cheap Mimosa’s and Bloody Mary’s. But the food here really shines. I had the Island Eggs Benedict with fried spam. The Spam sounds a little strange but it adds a wonderful smokey component to the dish. Add a little Siracha to the mix and I am in heaven.

The Best Beer In Baseball!

The Washington Post has an interesting little article summarizing which Ball Parks have the best selection of Micro Brews in the nation. Two things that caught my attention:

1- Chase Field has really got to step up its beer game.  We have so many good local brews here in AZ! San Tan Brewing, Four Peaks Brewing, Hess Brewing, & Oak Creek Brewing just to name a few.  Let’s get on this D-Backs!

2- Ok this may be a matter of opinion, but I certainly don’t consider Sam Adams Boston Lager & Blue Moon micro/craft brews! Maybe they were years ago, but not anymore. That’s like saying that Newcastle Brown Ale is a good, imported British Ale.  Sure they are drinkable but they certainly don’t belong on these lists.

Anyway those are my 2 gripes on the piece, but it’s definitely worth a look if you’re a Baseball fan.

 

-Thomas

Beer-Goggled Gaming!

The King

6830 E. 5th Ave., Scottsdale, AZ

Adorned with photos, drawings and the occasional velvet painting of different “Kings”, newly opened The King Barcade is pretty great! My friends and I are always on the lookout for a joint to wet our whistles and get our retro game on. This bar certainly delivers.

Being home alone leads to questionable decisions.

Every so often Mrs. H goes out of town for work. This usually leads to me playing video games, watching movies and hanging out with friends. But now I have a readership to think of. What would YOU want me to do with my free time? Well I assumed you would want me to drink a bottle of one of the worst kinds of booze I could find, live tweet the whole thing and then post a review a few days later. Was I wrong?

“What’s the word? Thunderbird. How’s it sold? Good and cold. What’s the jive? Bird’s alive. What’s the price? Thirty twice.”

Thunderbird- The American Classic, a citrus flavored fortified wine. %17.5 alcohol at 750ml. Wikipedia says that, ” Fortified wine is a wine to which a distilled spirit, usually brandy, is added.” If you were to ask me the next morning what a fortified wine was made of I would tell you with out question, that it was made with Satan’s Ass-Juice. But we will get to that. Thunderbird’s suggested serving method is cold. Very cold. This was obviously to mask the straight gasoline taste that Thunderbird has. I should have questioned my decision to review the bottle when I read that Consumerist.com  listed Thunderbird as one of the top 5 worst ways in the world to get drunk. For those that don’t care to click the link…it was #3.

Deep Dish & White Castle!

A Phoenician in South Chicago: A day’s dining guide

The weather is great here except for a few grueling months. You step off the plane and you can practically smell the deep dish pizzas, the hot dogs, and the italian beefs. You can’t wait to see the White Sox or maybe the Cubs after lunch at Portillos. And if you want to see Mike Ditka, you can always look for him at his restaurant.

Of course I’m talking about Phoenix, Arizona and NOT just Chicago. Yup, we are practically a suburb of the Windy City here in AZ as we are a final destination for a ton of Chicago transplants. As a Phoenix native myself, I sure do wish transplants would give our local cuisine more of a chance but I can’t fault them for bringing such great food with them.

 

But sometimes we Arizonans may find ourselves wandering and hungry in Chi-Town. If you are looking for a few great places to eat in Chicago that don’t have a direct equivalent here, then try these places that I hit in one day while visiting family in Oak Lawn, Il.

Breakfast at Niko’s Breakfast Club on 111th gives you a great taste of local atmosphere. I ordered their bacon waffle which has pieces of bacon cooked inside the waffle and sprinkled on top. I ate next to two Chicago cops and took in the great conversation they were having with locals. I only ate half the waffle which baffled the waitress. “Wasn’t it good? Why didn’t you finish it?” Yes it was good, and I definitely felt like I was eating in someone’s home, embarrassed for not finishing their amazing food.

Pizza Bombs!

Pizza Hut Cheesy Bites Pizza Review.

Cowabunga! In the spirit of eating things so you don’t have to, here’s a review of Pizza Hut’s latest gimmick, the Cheesy Bites Pizza. Now look, I get it. You have to come up with fresh new items to grab people’s attention when you’re in the food and beverage business. One of my neighbors worked on Crystal Pepsi which was a huge bomb in the soda sales world. And I’ll never forget what he told me. “There’s only so many ways you can sell sugar water.” Well, there’s also only so many ways you can sell sauce, bread, and cheese. The idea is fine but the execution is lacking. The whole pizza resembles a turtle shell which fits the Ninja Turtle movie tie in. It also allows people to tear off bite size pieces of bread with some cheese inside for guests who may not want to commit to a full piece. But really, it’s just a gimmick that disappoints. The actual pizza itself is way too greasy and a lot of real estate is taken up by the cheesy bites which means each slice gives you fewer bites of actual pizza than you’d typically expect. Kids might like it but if your wife is out with her friends and you’re home alone and you’re thinking “I can eat whatever I want and I have a deep love for the Ninja Turtles…” Well, you might not feel good about yourself after eating this. I sure didn’t.

-David

The Pride of London.

Let me just get this out of the way, I love beer. Like a lot! IPA’s, Pilsners, Stouts, Cervesas, Lagers, Ale’s, Porters, I will drink them all. I’m a particular fan of English Brown or Pale Ale’s. One of my favorites is Fuller’s London Pride.  In my travels I have only found this elusive beer on tap twice. First was The Fox and Hounds Pub on Ventura Blvd. in LA and the second is one of my favorite spots to grab a Happy Hour drink or watch a Soccer match, The Codfather! Today I am having a few pints with my partner-in-crime on this site David Sanchez. We will have a full review up of The Codfather at a later date. But for now I want to talk about this amazing beverage. Brewed in Chiswick by Fuller’s Griffin Brewery, this beer is one of the many outstanding British Ale’s available in the USA. The beer is a gorgeous, deep brown color. Like old leather. It has a nice crisp bite at first and finishes with a rich caramel aftertaste. I could drink this all night.  Which, funny story, I have. The first time we came across London Pride

Insert Torta here!

Tortas Paquimé.

Tucked into the SE corner of 25th St. & McDowell, this little joint is nothing special to look at and you might just drive by the unassuming location. But, it is more than that and worth a visit. The menu is plentiful and offers many typical Mexican food choices such as burritos, tostadas, flautas, etc. but where they really shine is their tortas (Mexican sandwich).

 

These delightful little suckers are so tasty! The carne asada torta is my favorite and comes with avocado, tomato, mayo (which I decline), jalapeños, and mustard. The bread is slightly sweet and toasted to a golden brown. The meat is tender and juicy and overall the sandwich is pretty spicy (jalapeños!). Homemade thick cut chips on the side and a small salsa bar completes the order.

Summer Booze!

Tragos Frescos Watermelon & Hibiscus
5.8% Alcohol

Hello folks! My name is Mrs. H and today I am going to talk about one of my favorite subjects: Alcohol. I recently tried a Tragos Frescos malt beverage in the Watermelon & Hibiscus flavor. I have to say it was quite tasty and refreshing on 111 degree day. I don’t think this is an everyday drink (for me) since while it is sweet, the aftertaste starts to get old…unlike a good sangria or cider.